I’m glad I stayed…

Today has been a very busy day and I took a break to read something I found on Pinterest. They have a lot of good mental illness/health literature. Just now I found something titled “I’m glad I stayed” and it is about people who tried to commit suicide that are glad they didn’t. They wrote out reasons why they were glad they stayed. So, I thought I would share my own.

I’m glad I stayed because after ALL of my failed relationships I finally met a man who gives me unconditional love. I’m glad he taught me what it really means to have a TRUE friend and fight for a friendship/marriage. I only had one other best friend and she left this world too soon. I’m glad I stayed because I would have missed the indescribable JOY that my children and just having my amazing family has brought me. I’m glad I stayed to read, sing, and play with my children and that they have good memories of things we did together when they were little. I’m glad I stayed because I would have never got the chance to build a relationship with my living brother. I’m glad I stayed because I would have missed out on how much God really loves me. I’m glad I stayed to enjoy His beautiful creation that I have grown to appreciate so much. I’m glad I stayed to fight back at this illness and get the help and treatment I needed to live a productive life. I’m glad I stayed and that I have been able to inspire people in different ways and they have been gracious to let me know I did. I’m glad I stayed because I love animals and I have 4 that I am thankful for. I’m glad I stayed because I had a really good visit with my mom about 2 years ago and it has been a long time. I’m glad I stayed to see my dad dressed up to go to church because I was too little to remember the last time he went. I’m glad I stayed because I have met some good people who have accepted me for who I am and not labeled me. I’m glad I stayed to watch myself accomplish goals I have set.  I’m glad I stayed because May 1st I have been married 20 years and have 19 years of sobriety.  I’m just glad I stayed….to see how much better life REALLY got for me!!

 

 

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2 thoughts on “I’m glad I stayed…

  1. I’ve never actually attempted suicide, although I have certainly thought about it far more than I would like to admit. I’m glad that whenever I have been really tempted to try, I have always chosen to stay as well. I do think there are lines that when crossed may make life unlivable, but I think it is always best when we are able to, to keep fighting. There are some times that just being able to survive one more day might be an extreme challenge, but if we are able to stay in the game we are victors, even if it might not seem it.

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    1. I was about 16 when I tried to commit suicide. I don’t even think I knew what it actually meant or the depth of what I was doing. I drank a lot, too. Looking back, I believe it was a desperate cry for help. I just wanted to be understood. I wanted to think that I meant something to someone. I think we should seek people out that feel different and tell them they have worth because I felt worthless. I remember reaching out to people in the past and other people asking me why I would reach out to them. And I say why wouldn’t I? I fought suicidal thoughts all of my teen and some of my adult life until medication. I still experience depression, but not as intense and with those thoughts. I think some people just have so much pain that they feel it’s the only way to make it stop. It’s sad.

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