Mental health is a topic that many people in society think they know so much about when in reality they know too little. Ignorance is the most devastating illness that plagues our society. The only cure is knowledge, so let me save you a co-pay and share the truth about people with a mental illness.
In this picture I literally was on Cloud 9, had my head in the clouds, gettin a taste of Heaven, feeling closer to Heaven, laying on the clouds..closer to God..This is just breathtaking to me..our plane ride to Mayo Clinic last year to get some awesome news! 🙏❤️😍
“Life is what happens to you while you are busy making other plans.”~John Lennon
“You’re going to go through tough times – that’s life. But I say, ‘Nothing happens to you, it happens for you.’ See the positive in negative events.”~Joel Osteen
“Time is precious. Make sure you spend it with the right people.” ~Anonymous
“If you are too busy to enjoy quality time with your family, then you need to re-evaluate your priorities.” ~Dave Willis
“The time to start is now.”~ ATGW
“While I thought that I was learning how to live, I have been learning how to die.”~ Leonardo da Vinci
“Death is not the greatest loss in life. The greatest loss is what dies inside us while we live.”~Norman Cousins
I just got back from my morning run! Go me! Sometimes you just have to encourage yourself you know?! Sooooo…
My daughter and I signed up recently to volunteer at a local retirement home for the elderly. I won’t call it a nursing home or assisted living because they don’t. While the volunteer coordinator was giving us a tour of the facility she referred to certain areas differently than I have heard. An example that stood out to me was an area called “Memory Care” but the places I have worked at before refer to it as Alzheimer’s Unit/Lockdown Unit. Do you see how different that sounds? To me there is so much more preserved dignity in the title “Memory Care.” It just sounds more compassionate!! Well that brings me to this…if you read any Health book you will find ways to maintain good “Mental Health”. That means obviously that we all have Mental Health issues or somebody wouldn’t have put it in a book. We are all prone to sadness, thinking negative which can lead to a depressed state, we all have anger and all of the emotions of a “normal” human being. But for some reason when you hear about Mental Health these days it is turned into “Mental Illness.” Which one has the better “label?” Of course the first one! Maybe those of us that “supposedly” think we struggle more we really don’t! Maybe the stigma is tied to the term “Mental Illness” and that’s where our main struggle really is. Hopefully that doesn’t confuse anyone. Realty probably is that the “diagnosis”makes us feel different than everyone else. But we aren’t! Which leads me to this…I have been put in two situations that have just down right annoyed me. I have listened to two different parents refer to their kids as one of them being the “bad” child and one of them being the “good” child. I was also considered the “bad” child or “black” sheep in my family. I am not taking away from the fact that we all have to take responsibility for our choices/emotions and we all have to maintain good mental health to do that. But a lot of people that struggle with good Mental Health is probably not so much as there is an “issue” or “illness” there. It may just be the fact that we have spent years being “conditioned” by parents, teachers, society in general to think we are bad or something is wrong with us because of the choices we have made. And because we have been made to feel “bad” for that…our perception of ourselves is distorted from the get go because we are judged by our performance and not as a person. That would make anyone “depressed.” Which deprives us of “dignity.” An example is when we have gotten “angry” with “just” cause…we were made to feel like that emotion isn’t normal. Then we feel like a failure for having the emotion. Then, we never feel good enough and we don’t allow ourselves to fail or feel because we have pretty much been brainwashed to think there’s something wrong with us if we express ourselves. And a lot of it falls back on people in our lives who were too busy looking at our mishaps that they didn’t take responsibility for their own. And maybe they hurt us deeply with their actions and turned everything back around on us when we told them how we felt. This caused us to feel responsible for their “stuff” too. Which leads me to this…just recently my dad apologized to me and finally accepted responsibility for not being a good role model to me!! That was his words! WOW that was a BIG deal for me…it helped me realize I had a right to feel all of those feelings towards him because of some of his choices. I was a child he was supposed to be the parent. Just think if he had of admitted that a long time ago and we had been able to sit down and talk about our struggles or difficulties together things could have been so much different. Maybe if he would have chosen abstinence instead of alcoholism my life may have been better and the temptation for me to drink wouldn’t have been as strong. I “learned” by example because I was a child. I carried weight around with me for years thinking I was this terrible person because I got upset over his actions. I don’t know but, bottom line is we all make “bad” choices sometimes because we are human. And we shouldn’t be made to feel “bad” or be told that we are “bad” because of them. We should be allowed to express our feelings and gain understanding into ourselves and each other as to why we feel the way we do. And if someone tells us we have hurt them we should find out why they feel that way and evaluate ourselves. Then, take responsibility for it and offer understanding and vice versa. When my dad told me that… I told him there have been times I haven’t been a good role model, too. And I meant that with my own children because none of us are perfect. I was able to have compassion for him #1 because he was taking responsibility #2 because I’m a parent and no matter how good of a parent/role model you are you will make mistakes. Anyway, my so called “mental illness” now requires me to take medication and maybe that’s my consequences for destroying brain cells with drugs and alcohol for years. Also, all of the mental anguish for trying to be responsible for my actions along with other people’s. That alone was probably firing off neurons in my brain. I think even Jesus had mental anguish because he sweated blood. So, for me I think it’s not so much an illness as it is consequences and now I am learning ways to maintain good “Mental Health.” I don’t drink or do drugs anymore, I try to think positive and practice gratitude and I try to practice good habits now. I no longer accept responsibility for everyone’s actions just my own. I am growing in this area, but I have had to “unlearn” things also for better Mental Health. I have had to practice a lot of positive self-talk because I took a lot of negative words from others and I started believing them myself. Like I was a trouble maker, different, demon child, etc…. those words had power over me for a long time. I have had to literally write down notes to myself. Like, I am beautiful, I am a good person, mom, wife, I have a purpose, God loves me unconditionally no matter what, etc…,it helps! These are just my thoughts for today. So, if you are struggling with maintaining good Mental Health find things that work for you to help you! But first rid yourself of the label that has been given to you if you have depression, mental “illness,” bipolar, ADHD, etc… and find the person set apart from all that and embrace YOU!! ❤️You are not any different from ANYONE else!!
Sooo yesterday my post “sounded” like I was totally down and in despair. Well….I have been the kind of person for a long time that chooses to bare her soul and sometimes that backfires on me. A lot of the reason is because some people in this world cannot deal with transparency very well. My heart’s desire has always been to reach others through my experiences and give them HOPE. When you are vulnerable to a hard-hearted world it can be difficult. I just PRAY I can be stronger and remember my story is for those who need to hear it. Even though there will be judgmental people and they may say hurtful things I just have to get back up and go forward. This morning, I was still struggling and talking to my husband about how I should have never shared anything. Well, after that ironically I picked up a devotional book that I have used for the past 3 years or so. I just happen to turn to this page where I had been journaling and I have no idea what year it was, but it’s been a while back. I hope you can read my writing. It’s funny how God works. I just have to keep asking for strength when I struggle with the issue of “over sharing.” Somebody needs to hear it and somebody needs to hear you, too! ❤️ So, I will choose today to be THANKFUL for my experiences and I pray they help someone even if I am judged for it.
2 Corinthians 4:8-12
8 We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; 9 persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed. 10 We always carry around in our body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be revealed in our body. 11 For we who are alive are always being given over to death for Jesus’ sake, so that his life may also be revealed in our mortal body. 12 So then, death is at work in us, but life is at work in you.
Sometimes I wish I would’ve never told anyone anything about myself or my life…especially about my depression and Bipolar. I wonder how different my life would be if I had just kept all of it to myself. If I would have just took my meds, practiced self-care and just stuck to my treatment plan and kept my mouth closed. It’s hard…
In Christ alone my hope is found
He is my light, my strength, my song
This cornerstone, this solid ground,
Firm through the fiercest drought and storm.
What heights of love, what depths of peace,
When fears are stilled, when strivings cease!
My comforter, my all in all
Here in the love of Christ I stand.
In Christ alone, Who took on flesh,
Fullness of God in helpless babe!
This gift of love and righteousness,
Scorned by the ones He came to save.
‘Til on that cross as Jesus died,
The wrath of God was satisfied
For ev’ry sin on Him was laid
Here in the death of Christ I live.
There in the ground His body lay,
Light of the world by darkness slain
Then bursting forth in glorious day,
Up from the grave He rose again!
And as He stands in victory,
Sin’s curse has lost its grip on me
For I am His and He is mine
Bought with the precious blood of Christ.
❤️No guilt in life, no fear in death this is the power of Christ in me From life’s first cry to final breath, Jesus commands my destiny. No power of hell, no scheme of man Can ever pluck me from His Hand ❤️
‘Til He returns or calls me home
Here in the power of Christ I’ll stand. 🙏✝️💓🎈
🌸YouTube this song it is beautiful Mercy Me sings it best!! 🌈
Why a few days ago could I seem so strong?!
Now its as if that strength doesn’t belong…
To me…because I’m weak and my pain is here again
It showed up out of nowhere the anguish in my brain
My body begins to shake… like I am in an earthquake
Where did that trigger come from I’m trying to escape have I fell into its trap
I have been strong for so long not taking any of its crap
Usually when I feel such gloom come creeping in
I go for a run and those thoughts they don’t win
They scream at me telling me you aren’t worth it you need to die!!
My heart calls back with its wrenching cry
Stay!! don’t leave those people that you love behind
And I just couldn’t get them out of my mind
I heard of a guy this week who couldn’t bear
And his life he couldn’t spare
So those thoughts of mine grew stronger causing such grief
I ran and i ran but I found no relief
Thinking about him my heart breaking into
Could I just do the same I don’t know what to do
As I ran I saw a bridge it had come into sight
Could I fling myself over it and it took all my might
As I ran over it… the pain washing… pulling at me
Engulfing me.. as if I wasn’t free and didn’t need to be
I fought and I fought I ran and I ran
It took forever to cross the bridge that felt like quicksand
I did it!! I made it to the other side my body still trembling from that frightful run 🏃🏻♀️ride
Gasping for air I could hardly breathe
Suffocating despair oh how you tried to deceive..
Me… into believing I needed to escape with you
You told me I wasn’t worth it but I know its not true
You can try and try but no matter what you say
I proved you all wrong I lived through another day!! As I was driving home..after that relentless blow….way up in the sky stood an amazing rainbow…the sign of a promise I felt my heart mend…I’m thankful today that my life didn’t end…